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Contact us Call us: 07870195160  |   Email us: stuff@smuttycards.com

Snaily Maily:  Tyrrells Online, Trenwyth, Penweathers,Truro, Cornwall TR3 6EA

Privacy Policy

SmuttyCards/SmuttyGifts/Tyrrells Online really, really care about your privacy.  Oh yes.

For this reason, we collect and use personal data only as it might be needed for us to deliver to you our stuff (yes, your order)
Your personal data includes information such as:

    Name
    Address
    Telephone number
    Email address
    Other data collected that could directly or indirectly identify you.

Our Privacy Policy is intended to describe to you how and what data we collect, and how and why we use your personal data.  It also describes options we provide for you to access, update or otherwise take control of your personal data that we process.

If at any time you have questions about our practices or any of your rights described below, you may reach our Data Protection Officer (what bollocks - that's me) and our dedicated team (also me) that supports this office by contacting us at smutmeister@smuttycards.com.  This inbox is actively monitored and managed so that we can deliver an experience that you can confidently trust.

What information do we collect?

We collect information so that we can provide the best possible experience when you utilise our services.  Much of what you likely consider personal data is collected directly from you when you:

(1) create an account or purchase any of our services (eg: billing information, including name, address, payment details) 
Yep, we need shit like that to send orders out.

(2) request assistance from our customer support team (eg: phone number, case notes) 
Well, you could ask us for help with an order and withold your name but it's just a bit silly.

(3) complete contact forms or request newsletters or other information from us (eg: email) 
Unlikely as we are crap at marketing, especially email.

(4) participate in contests and surveys, apply for a job, or otherwise participate in activities we promote that might require information about you. 
Bloody unlikely.  In 16 years we haven't held a competition or been daft enough to employ anyone.

Cookies and similar technologies on our websites allow us to track your browsing behaviour, links clicked, items purchased, your device type, and to collect various data, including analytics, about how you use and interact with our Services. This allows us to provide you with more relevant product offerings, a better experience on our sites and mobile applications, and to collect, analyse and improve the performance of our Services. We may also collect your location (IP address) so that we can personalise our Services. For additional information, and to learn how to manage the technologies we utilise, please visit our Cookie Policy.  Actually we are too disorganised to look at any stats.  It probably happens somewhere but we don't use the info.  The alternative to cookies, etc. is to fuck off elsewhere.

Data about Usage of Services is automatically collected when you use and interact with our Services, including metadata, log files, cookie/device IDs and location information. This information includes specific data about your interactions with the features, content and links (including those of third-parties, such as social media plugins) contained within the Services, IP address, browser type and settings, the date and time the Services were used, information about browser configuration and plugins, language preferences and cookie data, information about devices accessing the Services, including type of device, what operating system is used, device settings, application IDs, unique device identifiers and error data, and some of this data collected might be capable of and be used to approximate your location. 
Again, this happens.  It's an ecommerce site that does shit like this. If you have reservations about shopping online the best option is don't.


We strongly believe in both minimising the data we collect and limiting its use and purpose to only that (1) for which we have been given permission, (2) as necessary to deliver the Services you purchase or interact with, or (3) as we might be required or permitted for legal compliance or other lawful purposes. These uses include:

Delivering, improving, updating and enhancing the Services we provide to you. We collect various information relating to your purchase, use and/or interactions with our Services. We utilise this information to:

    Improve and optimise the operation and performance of our Services (again, including our websites and mobile applications)
    Diagnose problems with and identify any security risks, errors, or needed enhancements to the Services
    Detect and prevent fraud and abuse of our Services and systems
    Collecting aggregate statistics about use of the Services
    Understand and analyse how you use our Services and what products and services are most relevant to you

Often, much of the data collected is aggregated or statistical data about how individuals use our Services, and is not linked to any personal data, but to the extent it is itself personal data, or is linked or linkable to personal data, we treat it accordingly.

Sharing with trusted third parties. We may share your personal data with affiliated companies within our corporate family, with third parties with which we have partnered to allow you to integrate their services into our own Services, and with trusted third party service providers as necessary for them to perform services on our behalf, such as:

    Processing credit card payments.
    Performing analysis of our Services and customers demographics.  Unlikely.
    Communicating with you, such as by way of email.
    Customer relationship management, whatever that might be.

We only share your personal data as necessary for any third party to provide the services as requested or as needed on our behalf. These third parties (and any subcontractors) are subject to strict data processing terms and conditions and are prohibited from utilising, sharing or retaining your personal data for any purpose other than as they have been specifically contracted for (or without your consent).

Communicating with you. We may contact you directly regarding your order should the need arise.  I hope not as I am a virtual hermit and avoid most forms of contact. These contacts may include:

    Email
    Text (SMS) messages
    Telephone calls
    Smoke signals

You may also update your subscription preferences with respect to receiving communications from us and/or our partners by accessing your “Account Settings” page.  Deleting your account will remove all manner of data and the ability to shop with us.


Transfer of personal data abroad.
If you utilise our Services from a country other than the country where our servers are located, your communications with us may result in transferring your personal data across international borders. Your personal data will be transferred and processed outside of the EEA. In these cases, your personal data is handled according to this Privacy Policy.
Currently our servers are based in Britain. 
What fucking relevance this has is a mystery to me.

Compliance with legal, regulatory and law enforcement requests. We cooperate with government and law enforcement officials and private parties to enforce and comply with the law. We will disclose any information about you to government or law enforcement officials or private parties as we, in our sole discretion, believe necessary or appropriate to respond to claims and legal process (such as subpoena requests), to protect our property and rights or the property and rights of a third party, to protect the safety of the public or any person, or to prevent or stop activity we consider to be illegal or unethical.
So, don't be naughty.

To the extent we are legally permitted to do so, we will take reasonable steps to notify you in the event that we are required to provide your personal information to third parties as part of legal process.

Website analytics. We use analytics tools provided by service partners such as Google Analytics, to collect information about how you interact with our website or mobile applications, including what pages you visit, what site you visited prior to visiting our website, how much time you spend on each page, what operating system and web browser you use and network and IP information. We use the information provided by these tools to improve our Services. These tools place persistent cookies in your browser to identify you as a unique user the next time you visit our website. Each cookie cannot be used by anyone other than the service provider (eg: Google for Google Analytics and FaceBook). The information collected from the cookie may be transmitted to and stored by these service partners on servers in a country other than the country in which you reside. Though information collected does not include personal data such as name, address, billing information, etc., the information collected is used and shared by these service providers in accordance with their individual privacy policies. You can control the technologies we use by managing your settings through our Cookie Policy or the ‘cookie banners” that may be presented (depending on URL of website visited) when you first visit our webpages, or by utilising settings in your browser or third-party tools, such as Disconnect, Ghostery and others.

Targeted advertisements - we don't.

If you make a request to delete your personal data and that data is necessary for the products or services you have purchased, the request will be honoured only to the extent it is no longer necessary for any Services purchased or required for our legitimate business purposes or legal or contractual record keeping requirements.

If you are unable for any reason to access your Account Settings or our Privacy Centre, you may also contact us by one of the methods described in the “Contact Us” section below.

How we secure, store and retain your data.

We follow generally accepted standards to store and protect the personal data we collect, both during transmission and once received and stored, including utilisation of encryption where appropriate.

We retain personal data only for as long as necessary to provide the Services you have requested and thereafter for a variety of legitimate legal or business purposes. These might include retention periods:

    mandated by law, contract or similar obligations applicable to our business operations;
    for preserving, resolving, defending or enforcing our legal/contractual rights; or
    needed to maintain adequate and accurate business and financial records.

If you have any questions about the security or retention of your personal data, you can contact us at smutmeister@smuttycards.com


‘Do Not Track’ notifications

Some browsers allow you to automatically notify websites you visit not to track you using a “Do Not Track” signal. There is no consensus among industry participants as to what “Do Not Track” means in this context. Like many websites and online services, we currently do not alter our practices when we receive a “Do Not Track” signal from a visitor’s browser. To find out more about “Do Not Track,” you may wish to visit www.allaboutdnt.com.  Whoosh.


Age restrictions

Our Services are available for purchase only for those over the age of 18. Our Services are not targeted to, intended to be consumed by or designed to entice individuals under the age of 18. If you know of or have reason to believe anyone under the age of 18 has provided us with any personal data, please contact us.


Changes in our Privacy Policy

We reserve the right to modify this Privacy Policy at any time. If we decide to change our Privacy Policy, we will post those changes to this Privacy Policy and any other places we deem appropriate, so that you are aware of what information we collect, how we use it, and under what circumstances, if any, we disclose it. If we make material changes to this Privacy Policy, we will notify you here at least thirty (30) days prior to the implementation of the changes.
Wow.

Third party people.

We sell on Etsy and Ebay as well as our website(s)  They handle your details and have (or should have) their own policies in place)  All we get from those platforms is your name and address.
We use Nochex and PayPal as payment processors.  Again they have (or should have) their own policies in place.  We do not get to see any of your payment details.
We use Facebook and Instagram to bore people shitless with our products, stupid observations and photos of our dogs.  If you have any reservations about social media (and we all should) try and find some sense in their privacy policies.
We use Royal Mail, Hermes and other couriers.  Obviously we might have to input your details into their website in order to send your order.  If you have an issue with that online shopping is not really ever going to be your thing is it?


Paperwork and printed shit.

We print a postage label and a packing note with your name and address on.  If we didn't your order wouldn't go very far.


Computer Security.

Our computers are kept safely behind a regiment of Staffie crossbreeds.   Hooch, the biggest, would tear your fucking arm off if you tried to break in.  We also have locks on the doors.
We also have two baseball bats (his and hers), a machete, crossbow and a bad attitude towards burglars.
We do not access the website admin areas with mobile phones or tablets.  I tried to use the fingerprint thing on my phone but my hands are usually filthy and it didn't work.  Anyway that's actually irrelevant.

Contact us.

If you have any questions, concerns or complaints about our Privacy Policy, our practices or our Services, you may contact us by email at smutmeister@smuttycards.com

You may contact us by either of the following means:

    By Mail: Tyrrells Online, Trenwyth, Penweathers, Truro, Cornwall. TR36EA
    By Phone: 07870195160

We will respond to all requests, inquiries or concerns within 30 days.